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Yesterday was my birthday, a heartbreaking day, a good day, the days are confusing as I am wracked and roiled by my emotions. I go on, day after day, the days when I struggle to get of bed and the days when I run to write my words or create offers to heal the heart, both Affluence Code and BadWidow. My backdrop is lighter but still endless grief as far as my eye can see, punctuated by increasing moments of lightness. I am not committed to misery myself but healing. Yet, I am not in a rush to leave the grief behind, hurry it up for somebody else’s pleasure. It’s a puzzlement.

Wrung out like an old mop,
used to swab the factory floor,
so many miles done.

Abandoned like a too-small shell,
after its hermit crab
crawled away.

Shattered like a porcelain vase,
thrown in a rage
at the wall.

Immolated like coal in a mine,
compressed and compacted
into diamonds.

Tossed on 27-foot waves,
her ship almost founders,
but survives.

Wracked with grief, anger, fear,
tears flood her face,
ignored.

Another first without him,
her birthday, loved and alone,
over, and the world goes on.
She lives on with her whole heart,
both broken and healing,
every day.